Sometimes it’s I find it hard to tell the story of Syx and I, because there was no great romance or love at first sight, chance encounter or blind date. We were just really great friends.
The photo archives tell me that I met Syx in October of 2003. We knew of eachother through mutual friends in the tattoo and piercing shop scene and connected online when he asked me to model for him, and I nervously agreed, SO NERVOUSLY. On a photoshoot in the studio that would later become my home we met for the first time. He was handsome and older and his lovely girlfriend was there too and I was awkward at 18, even more awkward than I am now (if you can imagine that!) and had a lot of issues with my body. Syx had an eye for awkward, an eye for weird and the one thing that stands out more than anything about that first meeting with him was that he made me feel beautiful. Seriously beautiful.
I modeled for Syx often over the next few years, both for his classes and personal projects and we started to become pretty close. I would purposely detour by his house on my way home from work and he would make me a coffee and we would share a smoke, chatting the afternoon away. So many afternoons spent sitting cross legged on his floor while he edited photos and I helped him with paperwork while I would bitch about the guys I was dating and would tell me to dump the asshole. I would show up on his doorstep crying when I felt like my life was falling apart and he would shake me and tell me to pull it together. He was always tough on me but in a way I needed, and he was always ALWAYS there for me.
When I went through my first real heartbreak, the gut-wrenching can’t eat, can’t sleep heartbreak I must’ve lost 20 pounds and didn’t get out of bed for 3 days. Syx came over and physically made me get up and that night he took me out to a show where I could be among friends and stop moping. When my ex showed up and I wanted to run away and back to bed in my sad drunken state, he made me stand my ground and held me in a dark corner and let me cry into his neck. I remember the way his arms felt looped under my arms holding me up because I just couldn’t do it on my own.
So how you decide to start dating your best friend?
I seriously don’t even know. I still don’t.
There was a day, we were out for a walk at Ambleside Park, both lamenting and feeling a little bitter about our recent breakups. Talking about the future, what we wanted from life, the things we wanted to do. And as the conversation unfolded there were a series of tiny clicks that happened. Quiet clicks. Familiar clicks. The paths we wanted to walk were so similar, intersecting even and after that we started looking at eachother a little differently. Then slowly, and cautiously and very aprehensively we set out along an uncharted path together. A few months went by and he went home to Ontario for Christmas to be with his family and that’s really when I knew something was changing between us, I missed him in a way I never had before. I missed him so much I snuck into the studio and slept in his bed just to feel near him.
When he got back to Vancouver we spent New Year’s Eve together, and I think that’s when we knew it was real. I seem to remember spending a lot more time together after that. Although Livejournal entries tell me that I was writing bad poetry for him on Dec 11 and telling me I started keep tampons under his sink on Dec 12 2007.
i call you my sort of boyfriend
to anyone who sees you
kiss me longer than just friend kiss
i tell them sometimes i love you
and that you trust me with your spare key
(something about you feels like home)
I moved in that April and I found out I was pregnant with Hanna in August and we got married the August after that.
Some love stories sneak up on you.
Some love stories are quiet.
Some love stories are unassuming.
Life isn’t perfect. We argue, we don’t always see eye to eye and sometimes I forget that his tough love is one of the things I love the most about him.
But not a single day goes by that I’m not thankful for a PARTNER in life that supports me, encourages me, and inspires me. Believe me, I count my blessings because I KNOW how lucky I am.
So even though I don’t buy into the hallmark holiday, I do buy into an excuse to acknowledge the huge amount of love I have for the person I share my life with. So Happy Valentine’s Day Michael Syx.
I love you so much and am so grateful for you and all the amazing years we spent building this relationship before it existed.
XOXO
Tell me your love story!
